Review of Curt Cobain bio, Heavier than Heaven
I just finished reading Heavier than Heaven, by Cross, A biography of Curt Cobain. True to its title it was by all means heavy. I must start by stating that the Nirvana Unplugged CD is one of the most inspired recordings I have personally encountered. Here was this band, LOUD, lyrics barely audible over the guitar and the general thrashing of instruments. I wasn’t sure what to make of the Band and more specifically the man behind what was lauded as the Best Band of our generation. Then Unplugged was aired, released and I was in awe, a convert, a believer, for what I heard in the paired down songs was pure genius and I never looked back.Upon reading this biography, (I had also read Cross’s Bio of Jimi Hendrix and really enjoyed it) I was completely taken aback by Curt Cobain.
I know that the reader here might expect a newly formed respect for Cobain, deeper than the one I felt after Unplugged. Rather, I have to say with all honesty and with no disrespect to the dead that this was not the case at all.
From the description of Curt as a child through his struggle to develop the band I was astonished to learn what a completely inauthentic person he was. From his early exaggerations of his family plight, to his constant telling of stories that were bold faced lies, he came across as a sulking bore. He was as inconsistent as he was attention starved. He appeared to see himself as a tragic hero, yet his behavior was that of a manipulative self absorbed celebrity.
Those who have a rudimentary knowledge of the band and the infamous front man have probably heard about his resentment towards fame and his shirking of it. But what I learned from the biography was that in itself was a ploy. He needed, wanted and craved fame with a hunger that at times seemed to go against all he said and did. He courted the media, invited the scrutiny and then in the same breath denied the very thing he was doing.
The Curt Cobain I read about exaggerated every part of his early childhood, for what seemed to be yet another ploy to garner sympathy for his plight. The artists struggle so often witnessed through the self destruction of our most talented figures was a contrived, deliberate endeavor by Cobain. He wrote in his journals (the source of much of the biography) that he DECIDED to become a junkie. Perhaps at first it was a way to alleviate the obvious physical pain he had involving his Stomach and IBS. He self medicated then escaped into a drug fog that would stay with him for years. Did he admit his rabid use of “Heroine” ever? No, instead he rationalized it and when it took over his life and the SHAME he claimed to feel was not quite enough to keep him from maintaining any length of clean time. and not sticking that needle into his scarred arm.
He was a passive aggressive partner, never having the courage to confront any relationship that was not working. He “fired” band members by not calling them, never being able to have the decency of a man, to say that things were not working.
He had the audacity to say that he would one day join the club of Jimi, Janice and Jim who died at 27 by various means. He must then have thought himself a peer to these musicians and wanted nothing more than to imitate the fall of the greatest musical minds, so that he would then be lumped with them, as society inevitably did. Please note, Jimi died of an ACCIDENTAL overdose and was NEVER a heroine junkie. The rest all suffered similar fates. They did not stick a shotgun in their mouths and pull the trigger, while simultaneously overdosng on an lethal amount of Heroin. The others he wished to emulate, I might add did not have a wife and new baby that loved them and that were left forever wondering why Daddy ate his shotgun. They never left a note to loved ones, and certanly never to their FANS.
The note. If he was so disgusted by his fame, why apologize to the fans, why make any excuses at all? Manipulation at its best and worst. Let’s not forget that he left Courtney Love to take the brunt of the anger and responsibility for his suicide. Did anyone know she never used a needle before she met Curt? Somehow though, she was Yoko and blamed for all his torture. HA I say! That is the biggest lie ever because he was the one who almost destroyed her.
Alright then, so it is probably clear that I have some strong feelings about the man I thought was a sensitive soul too good for this earth. He was never any of that. What he was, a user, a whiner, a self indulgent dictator, insecure, fake, and orchestrating of all the events around him. He was a pathological LIAR and he did this all to make himself look good. Did he care what people said about him? More than anything else, it was his reason for being. Was he too sensitive for the world and therefore needed to SHOOT HIMSELF IN THE HEAD because it was better for Frances to live without a father. PLEASE, what a joke. He was however the most selfish celebrity I have ever had the chance to read about in detail. HE WAS A PUSSY, A FRAUD and DID NOT DESERVE THE CULT STATUS, FOR HE WAS NEVER DESERVING OF IT.
It is rare that I have such an intense response to an individual whose art I had admired. Reading about Jimi, John Lennon and others I came away with a greater love and understanding of these icons. But in the case of Nirvanas front man I come away disenchanted, angry and with the feeling I was led on. And in fact I was because when Curt lived he did everything to make himself the tragic hero; he knew he would never be. Shame on him for such manipulation. Shame on him for being so excruciatingly selfish as to destroy so many lives around him with no regard for any one else’s needs. Shame on me for believing the HYPE.
Copyright ©2007 Veronica Romm
27 responses so far ↓
Michael // December 22, 2007 at 1:28 pm
You might want to correct his name: Kurt Cobain.
I too have read the book and for me I was curious about the hint of what was going on inside of him.
I really enjoyed your account of the book and how you related to it. I believe when we read a biography or memoir we all relate to some detail of the life lived. That is “our” curiosity because like Kurt said in a song I was listing today, “What’s Wrong With Me?”
But my friend you have no right to judge because you did not know all the feelings this individual had. You did not know the true source of his suffering. You did not know the man, period.
Most people, if not all people don’t know themselves. That is a fact and just Google self help books and you will see. Look at the rise of the use of anti-depressants in the last few years. Look at it friend.
You entitled to you opinion, but don’t sell it to me.
How can one know better or beauty or appreciation or love unless one has known profound sadness. That is what I know and yes my dear friend I have suffered too but I haven’t pulled the trigger yet. Some how I never seem to get to that point, but I know a lot of people personally who have.
Loved the conversation here and keep up the good work. It is rare that someone writes something and elicits a response from me which you have and thus engaged me.
Merry Christmas,
Michael
Alan // December 23, 2007 at 2:57 pm
Kurt spelled his name both ways with a C or K.
asdf // April 10, 2008 at 9:50 pm
you spelt kurt wroong dumbass
veronicaromm // April 10, 2008 at 11:09 pm
@ asdf: If you had a clue you would know he spelled his name both ways, and oh… it says as much in the comments. Thanks for the tip though.
Outdoors2 // April 11, 2008 at 11:06 am
‘People are Strange’
JM
Aaron // April 26, 2008 at 7:32 am
I would like you to consider this, the main contributer to this book (courtney love) is a pathological liar, for god sakes the woman claims she was performing fellatio on ted nugent when she was 12 years old! Krist, Dave, Tobi, Kathleen, Beverly, Mm/Dad , Chad, Dale, Jason, Dan , Aaron, and Dave f. HAD NO PART in the writing of this book whatsoever, you shouldnt believe everything you read especially when the last part is fictional.
Aaron // April 26, 2008 at 7:33 am
Kurt was also bipolat, you really should look before you leap…
Aaron // April 26, 2008 at 7:34 am
Sorry I meant BIPOLAR. Research it please.
veronicaromm // April 26, 2008 at 11:04 am
@ Aaron I appreciate your passion for this subject. I too feel passionately about things and obviously about the biography I read. As you tell me to look before I leap, in the same paragraph you berate Love and accuse me of believing everything I read. Well, this particular biography is taken from K/Curt’s own journal entries. Believe it or not I tend to do research beyond reading one book and therefore have a bit more of a clue than you give me credit for. As for Bipolar disorder, I have in fact researched it as I have a masters degree in psychology and have worked with the mentally ill population hands on for years. Also Dave and other members of the band did indeed speak with the author.
The most important issue here is that you feel one way, I feel another. I wrote about it, you disagree and that is fine. My suggestion to you is if you really want someone, (me) to hear you, then try an approach that is less offensive, putting me immediately on the defensive which I admit I did given that you left 3 comments on the subject. Unless you are a close family member of Cobain (note he was not close to his family at all) your opinion is as valid as mine. Thanks for reading. Veronica
Aaron // May 4, 2008 at 4:48 am
I would like to say this: if you knew about bipoar disorder (which I HAVE) you would know that people don’t think rationally about suicide they’re thought’s are “this world will better without me” they think that their loved ones will have a better life , in his head Heroine WAS the right thing to do. I’ve read some of “kurt cobain journals” and I don’t remember this stuff. If kurt came out and said “hey I’m bipolar” he would probably have been written off, maybe he came up with these stories to compensate for NOT having a rough childhood, no disrespect to them but, face it people who have grown up poor and/or lived in the ghetto, or had an abusive childhood, or were homeless AND then become famous usually get A LOT of AIRTIME, maybe thats how he felt he wasn’t good enough so he needed to compensate.
Aaron // May 4, 2008 at 5:27 am
I didn’t “berate love” I was simply stating that, that is HER CLAIM, and that it smells like a pile of BS, I dislike her she is milking nirvana for all its worth, however I DON’T think she killed him. I’m not a family member (though maybe somebody should contact them to get the REAL STORY). Admitily I don’t like the fact that he would compare himself to the 3 j’s but that wont stop me from liking his music. How do we know that these aren’t “all bold faced lies?”, maybe I was wrong on some of the interviews but maybe those people were taken out of context? Listen I’m sorry for being so defensive but I find most of this hard to believe it contradicts dave and krist even if they were interviewed. Have you ever been to viretta park?
veronicaromm // May 4, 2008 at 6:37 am
@Aaron: You came back. I am glad. You basically proved both our points in your comments. I never claim to know “what really happened” nor did I go into reading the biography with anything but curiousity. As I say at least twice in the review the Unplugged is inspired and that is not disputable. I certainly don’t believe everything I read and if you check out this blog further you will see that. I wrote about my personal reaction to reading the book. It was a first for me to feel so strongly, I had to write a very risky review. It is a touchy subject for sure. In terms of Bipolar, you say he didn’t know what he was doing, but in fact he had planned it out, by running away from rehab and setting up the scenario rather lucidly. The note is the giveaway. People suffering from mental illness rarely explain their suicide attempts, nor leave notes. It was him having the last word. Again though it is just how I see it. There is no argument to have because it boils down to you feeling one way and me another. That is the best part of life, being able to make a choice one way or the other.
Thanks for coming back. Veronica
http://www.ew.com/ew/article/0,,171188,00.html check out this review, which asserts that the book is complied from 400 interviews and Cobains private journals.
Damien // May 5, 2008 at 5:52 pm
Seriously, is calling him (Kurt Cobain) a pussy and a fraud really professional?
I understand if you have harsh reviews about the book or even about his life, but choose your words a little better. Im sorry if you were a little upset about the book, but please have a little dignity.
First off, It wasn’t his fault that he was seen as a god in the music world. He had no control of his rising star and most importantly no control over his physical and mental anguish! Apparently you haven’t suffered from clinical depression because if you had you wouldnt be so insensitive to it. Its people like us who read his PRIVATE thoughts (His journals) who are at fault in giving him the “CULT STATUS” he has been labled with. It is us who CREATE the HYPE. It’s funny how you respected his music and talents until you learned what he was like in his PRIvATE life. Its irresponsible as human beings to publish his private life and thoughts only to pass judgement on someone who isnt alive to defend himself.
People have problems and ALL people have flaws. Just think if every aspect of your life was disected to its very genesis in front of the ENTIRE world… what imperfections and fradulent lies would we all see about you? “He who is clear of sin cast the first stone.” Oh and he didn’t spell his name with a “c” sometimes. He spelled it Kurt Cobain and Kurdt Kobain.
veronicaromm // May 5, 2008 at 8:37 pm
@ Damien: Thanks for your intense and passionate comment/response to my review. I am not trying to be professional, actually i am writing for myself. No my reaction wasn’t professional it was personal so a book review it isn’t that I know. I also never stated that I am clean of sin, but I got clean. Thoughts are private, writing in a journal leaves a record. So does a suicide note. You want to get a rise out of me? Sorry, not happening. Your opinion is welcome here, but respect wouldn’t be such a bad idea because then you can be taken seriously. Attacking me, my writing not the way to go. Just displaying ignorance and is that how you want to be seen? Thanks for the time, Veronica
Damien // May 6, 2008 at 1:13 am
Let me apologize… Im sorry if I came of as attacking you. Im not attacking you or your writing. Im only defending someone I have great respect for. I don’t normally feel sorry for celebrities but I truly feel sorry for 2 famous people, Kurt Cobain and Tupac Shakur. I just hate what society does to people through the media and especially after they have passed on. I was only trying to point out that the media created the bad things you saw in kurt (and there were a lot of bad things) and hopefully restore u as a believer once again! I love his talents and music and no matter what personal problems he had… they will not change my views on my liking for his music. I dont want to be seen as ignorant, only opinionated and having conviction because in this day in age theres not much to believe in. Sorry if I came off as offensive… that wasn’t my intention. - Damien
veronicaromm // May 6, 2008 at 3:12 am
@ Damien. Thank you for coming back. No need to apologize in fact if anything we seem to have a lot in common on terms of our passion and convictions. Again who am I to judge anyone, so I try not to. At times I guess I am compelled to put my two cents in, but I am always looking for another perspective, I welcome that. Also writing and posting should be done with a thick skin, and i welcome all sorts of comments especially ones that are genuine and thought provoking. So hopefully you will come by and read some more. It takes a cool individual to both stand up for their beliefs yet be able to hear others, and I think you did that initially just in a provocational way. Rambling, sorry, Veronica
Katie // May 27, 2008 at 5:58 pm
Veronica,
I really enjoyed reading about your thoughts on Heavier than Heaven. I’ve listened to Nirvana for quite some time, but only have recently started to do research on Curt Cobain. I think many people have different views of him, and I honestly think that all are somewhat correct. Many people view him as “A PUSSY” and “A FRAUD” while others believe he deserves the same recognition as Jimi Hendrix and other rock Gods. I have so much respect for Curt Cobain and his work, and it seems that he went through so much. He was such an intellectual man and proved that to us through his music and through his interviews. But I also think that he could not handle the world, or rather the world could not handle him. I think it all comes down to him being very confused. He contradicted himself not only in the lyrics of his songs, but in his journals. As you said in your review, he wanted fame, but then turned right around and blamed fame for his troubles. I don’t think that very many people could understand him, and maybe he couldn’t understand himself. In the end, I think that people should not argue whether he was one of the greatest beings on earth or one of the biggest pussies, but enjoy what he left us with; his music. It’s obvious that the one thing he did put effort into was his music, and it turned out amazing.
RIP Curt.
Katie
Katie // May 27, 2008 at 6:05 pm
Also, I believe his birth name is Kurt Cobain, but I do remember seeing it spelled with both a C and a K.
veronicaromm // May 27, 2008 at 6:47 pm
@ Katie. Very well said and I agree completely for like I said I think Unplugged was masterful and one of the best live performances I have ever seen. Both shocking in its pared down acoustics it showed the genius that I had not recognized before. Thank you for taking the time to comment. Veronica
Aaron // May 30, 2008 at 4:12 am
Whew! Sorry It took me so ,ong to reply! Anyway I’m afraid your wrong on a couple things. Manly though who you said was interviewed, first off dave grohl was NEVER interviewed for the book. second neither was KC’s mom (the parent whom he lived with the most), Now that I have completely read his journals I can say this, most of the things you mentioned WERE NOT in his journals. Anyway at this point I don’t want to get into a big agrument, so I will just say this: kurt cobain is somebody very complicated, and I don’t think we’ll ever know what his real thoughts and motivations were, while he may have had many demons and while I may not like some of the things he did I will still continue to admire his music if not the man himself. By the way I understand you have a degree in psychology, but that doesn’t mean you know what its like to have BD, I guess because I have the disorder also I will let him slide on some things because I myself have thought/done them too. Anyway its quite fun to read you opinions despite the fact that we heavily disagree.
Love,
your disagreeing reader (friend?) aaron.
Aaron // May 30, 2008 at 4:13 am
P.S.
Sorry for the typos!
the advice girl // May 30, 2008 at 5:36 am
@ Aaron, glad to have you back. I agree that its great to have people to debate with and also that can make you think. This only helps me see how emotionally involved I got with my review. I have reread it on many occasions and it does make me wonder a bit why I was so angry. I came to the conclusion that I like you and a lot of others wanted him to be something he wasn’t and was pissed to learn some of the “truth” Always a pleasure to spar with you. Come back again.
Raheem // June 25, 2008 at 1:30 am
I understand that I am simply reiterating many of the previous commentaries, but I just have to ask. I cannot figure out how you can end your review of this book with referring to Kurt Cobain as a pussy and undeserving of his fame, nor of disbelief of you believing the hype. I’ll agree with you that I was disgusted by his tendency to lie compulsively, comparing this attribute to friends I know who do the same thing. However, I saw this as his way to unleash anger towards his parents (as it seemed the majority of his most paramount lies were focused around his childhood and feelings toward his parents after the divorce) due to the everlasting effect their break-up and ensuing fights had upon him. I am a firm believer that Kurt suffered from severe clinical depression, and being stuck inside your head for so many years, with seemingly no one to reach out to in the way he undoubtedly needed can have unspeakable effects. I just finished the book, about 15 minutes ago, and man it struck a deep chord in me. I was horrified by many things, particularly how he treated Krist, his best friend and confidant for so long, but I end up coming back to the same conclusion that he was a man who wanted something so fiercely, and when he got it, he just didn’t know what to do with it and how to handle it. But his rise to fame in such a short period, the separation he, Novoselic, and Grohl adamantly tried to keep from becoming just another corporate sell-out, his scarring childhood, and underneath it all being such an unbelievable musical genius, I just cannot understand how you can deem him such a low-life. I see how his disregard and ultimate abandonment of his family and friends, excessive lying, abuse of drugs, and much more may lead many people to conclusions such as yours, but the power that the human mind can have upon a human being, especially after it being enveloped in so many drugs at a young age, emotionally interrupted, and in my opinion suffering from severe depression, should not be overlooked.
veronicaromm // June 25, 2008 at 10:52 am
@Raheem: Thank you for commenting and taking the time to write. I have come to a conclusion that this is not really a review of the book as much as a reaction to the man and I wrote it as soon as I finished reading it. I am a psychologist, and personally have suffered from depression and ADHD. Thankfully for me I did not turn to heroine or suicide as a way to deal with the troubling state of my mental health.
I stand behind what I wrote today, because it is simply put, my opinion. I am not the last word on anything. So I cannot help you in your confusion about how I could call him a liar and other choice words. That is my right, as it is yours to feel your emotions. I do not feel like I was hard on him and out of respect for the dead, I could have been more forgiving. But his manipulation to the last detail, i.e. dying at 27 like the greats, Janis, Hendrix, Morrison was too much for me. He was a selfish little boy who never grew up, treated people like crap and lied to all. That is why I wrote what I wrote. Thanks for reading. Veronica
ps Cross also wrote a bio on Hendrix, I highly recommend it.
Micah // June 28, 2008 at 6:44 am
Veronica lets go on a date sometime soon. You look way too fine to be on here arguing with people over the net. Send me an email
Im 28 years old and a working professional also 
Micah // June 28, 2008 at 6:56 am
If you dig deep enough, U will find something in common for every musician that had a HUGE following. Kurt Cobain, Jimi Hendrix,Janis Joplin,Jim Morrison,Tupac Shakur,Christopher Wallace(Notorious Big).
People in our goverment STATED that they were troublesome to social stability in one way or another, the goverment all had files on them, they all died under suspicious circumstances. This is not a conspiracy “theory”, these are simple truthful facts that anyone can find if they spend a little time researching.
Since this thread is about Kurt, I will simply write the facts pertaining to his case which are suspicious. Keep in mind all the things he “alledgedly” wrote, could have and probaly where altered for various devious reasons. Its very easy to fake something for someone whos not around to dispute it. Here are the facts*.
Courtney Loves’ odd behavior leading up to Kurt’s death
Kurt Cobain was talking about leaving Courtney Love prior to his death, writing her out of his will, and said he would attempt to get full custody of their child. Kurt was worth much more to Courtney dead than he was alive.
The police ignored the fact that Kurt had earlier stated he was not suicidal, and that all other people who knew him personally said he was not suicidal (including friends, his band mates, and the psychiatrist who treated him after the incident in Rome)
The P.I., Grant, who was hired by Love, immediately contacted police to tell them something wasn’t right with the suicide explanation.
Kurt Cobain’s blood had had 1.52 mg/L of heroin. This is 3 times the lethal dosage, even for heavy users. Even with an extremely high tolerance, this would kill near instantly. In fact this is substantially higher then the maximum lethal dose, at which it is impossible to survive, not matter how high of a tolerance you have.
Even if the heroin did not outright kill him, he would either be comatose, or at the very least unconscious. If by some miracle has was still awake and conscious, he would be in no state to pick up a shotgun and take his own life.
Study was done on 3586 suicides including 760 violent suicides, in which not a single case was found which involved both a gun and a narcotics overdose of any kind. This would be a completely unique case.
In one of the suicide studies used of the 128 lethal heroin overdoses, only 3 had greater or equal blood levels of heroin that was found in Kurt.
There are 2000 - 1 odds of a missing person committing suicide.
85% of spouse murders take place in the home.
Kurt’s credit card was being used after his death by unknown persons, until his body was found.
The shotgun had no fingerprints whatsoever, including Kurt’s. Somehow a dead man wiped his gun clean.
The suicide note, after analysis, was shown to have been written by two people. If the two parts are read separately, the majority, in Kurt’s handwriting could easily be interpreted as a note to Kurt’s fans regarding him leaving the music industry. (It was well known by people that knew him that he was thinking about this, he has even talked to his band mates about this) The last for lines however, which really made this note a suicide note, are written in someone else’s handwriting.
His heroin kit was neatly back in its case, even though the effects of his massive does would be felt instantly.
When the odds of each of the following are multiplied; overdose at Kurt’s levels, overdose among a missing person, violent suicide of a drug addict, a gun and an overdose in the same suicide, the resulting odds are 0, as this event has no precedence, even in the military which has a high suicide rate, and even in heroin cases, not once has a suicide by heroin coincided with a fatal gunshot wound.
Dead men don’t pull triggers.
Kat // July 19, 2008 at 5:27 pm
I am not a fan of Cross’ book - or as some people put it including Everett true who was a friend of Nirvana and Courtney (at one time) - as the ” Courtney Love sanctioned version of events”. Many of the supposed facts are from unnamed sources and as we know with Sanford’s book many of theses supposed sources told complete fiction (acknowledged by those close to Nirvana). Having been a fan of Nirvana since Bleach, I am astounded at how Cobain’s life story keeps changing. Courtney was certainly not left to’ bear the brunt’, in fact she has profited very nicely out of Kurt and it is a known fact she tells (and sells) lies about their time together and his life. She resents the fact she could never emerge from his shadow. You look at how people write about her and they always mention her as Cobain’s widow to this day. If only Cross had not relied so much on Courtney’s word and un-named sources. This book has little credibility. It is a shame Veronica you read this book - you should read ‘Come As You Are’ instead. Don’t get me wrong I don’t think Cobain is a ‘God’ or whatever and he certainly isn’t perfect (who is) but it is amazing how each Biography suddenly changes Kurt’s life story. I would gather many people just like to make a buck and get their name down in history - whether fact or fiction.
Leave a Comment